Cynic “Marta”* Stewart Braises** some Chicken

I kg Boneless chicken
1 Tbsp Worteschire sauce
1 Tbsp Ketchup
1 Tbsp Soya Sauce
1 Tbsp Cooking vinegar
1 Tbsp Freshly Ground Pepper
1 Tbsp Vegetable oil
1 Tbsp of freshly ground ginger- garlic paste
Salt to taste
1/2 cup water

First take a fork and stab the chicken. All that anger against the boss, all that pent up bai frustration, all that client angst, think about that and stab, stab, stab.
Add the salt on the festering wounds, ( also add pepper and ginger garlic paste)
In a seperate container beat all the sauces together until they are black and brown – smear the sauce on the chicken and ignore it for a couple of hours.

In a thick bottomed skillet** ( buwahahah) add oil, and shallow fry the chicken pieces until they are crispy brown.

Shift the whole lot to a pressure cooker, add some water and boil the hell out of them.

Serve on a plate, add whatever black and brown liquid remains on top. Can be garnished with onion rings if you are aesthetically inclined.

Also sing along with the following:

I have been waiting all my life for a braised pepper chickin’,
So brown and crispy, it’s just finger lickin’.
The thought of it, makes my heart keep tickin’
My finger licking, heart tickin’, braised pepper chickin

Is it ready,
Is it bready
Can I spready?
On my plate?

*Marta = Beating in konkani
** Braises, skillet am I a chef or what?


6 responses to “Cynic “Marta”* Stewart Braises** some Chicken

  1. “First take a fork and stab the chicken”.
    To kill it?
    To ensure it’s dead?
    If it’s already dead, isn’t it like flogging a dead chicken, umm horse?

  2. It should also be called “Cynic “Marta”* Stewart Bruises** some Chicken”, no? Bwahahaha.

    What, it’s Friiiiiday!

  3. Shub – to ensure that its all pokey. Argh dont start on bruising analogy no – already got enuf of it from young manu. Why do you think im beating the recipe eh? eh? eh?

  4. ROFL @pent up bai frustration. Hahaha!!

  5. Sounds very macabre. I like.

    **Worte-whaaaaa — I refuse to add anything I can’t pronounce.

  6. G – that IS my pet peeve right now. Sigh

    Mo – macabre is morticia.:D. also worte wart is bloody mary ingredient


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